When I became a woman

Before I became a woman I used to love the thrill of short-lived relationships where if it felt good,looked good and smelt good then it must be IT. Before I became a woman I used to throw tantrums when things did not go my way and made sure people knew I was mad. Before I became a woman I used to think that being a "don't care" meant I was an independent woman.Before I became a woman I only saw the world revolving around me. Before I became a woman I thought that a fast track career would make me happy.Before I became a woman I used to run to people for comfort when I got my heart broken. You see before I became a woman I thought that my hips, lips and finger tips were what separated me from girls.

BUT...

When I became a woman I realized that all the attention I got from boys was nothing compared to the attention I would get from that ONE man that God has set apart for me whose wisdom will remind me of Solomon, whose faith will remind me of Abraham, whose leadership  will remind me of Moses and most of all whose character will remind me of Christ!. and so I chose to wait..

Song 8:4 Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.

When I became a woman I realized that I should be spirit-led and less emotionally-led, where I would refuse to be controlled by my emotions even when I feel justified because its "that time of the month". I should refuse to hold grudges, I should refuse to release my frustrations on someone just because am having a "bad day" and where I do not ask myself how I FEEL in order to do something right but do it because its right.

Galatians 5:16: But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.
When I became a woman I realized that being independent meant me depending on Christ, me depending on friends and family when I am not able to do on my own. So I had to build my relationship with Christ, my family and friends and go from  a "don't care" attitude to a "do-care" attitude and care about others more than I do myself.

  Philippians2:4:Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.

When I became a woman I realized that this life is not my own and am stable only when Christ is the center of my life that with Him as my foundation I am unshakable! I realized that placing myself before Him meant that I would draw my strength from myself and am only human so I would get weary and so now I draw my strength from the ONE who promises to renew my strength.

Isaiah 40:31: But those who trust in the Lord for help will find their strength renewed. They will rise on wings like eagles; they will run and not get weary; they will walk and not grow weak.
When I became a woman I realized that people will fail you simply because they are human and so I stopped running to people when I had my heart broken and instead I get down on my knees and talk to the ONE who is able to put back every piece of my heart and make it whole, the ONE who sees every tear and says "I will never leave you nor forsake you" meaning He would never walk away even when things got tough.
When I became a woman I realized that nothing in this world would satisfy and all along I was looking for things and people to fill the void in my heart which HE only can fill.
When I became a woman I realized a woman's beauty goes beyond the physical, its her gentle spirit, its her warm presence, its her giving heart, its her calm nature and her love for good that makes her GORGEOUS.

  Deuteronomy 31:8: It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.

 

 1 Peter 3:3-4: Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. 

 

Mathew 6:33:But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

I have to say that when I became a woman I changed my role models and stopped looking up to the women who drop it like its hot, who sleep around because they are playing the field and who make their choices based on articles in magazines. Instead I choose to aim at having the obedience of Mary, the faith of Rahab, the humility of Ruth, the boldness of Esther, the hard-working nature of the proverbs 31 woman and most importantly that my character would reflect that of Christ.

GUEST BLOG FOR MEN ONLY: Sexual Purity for believers By Ernest Wamboye

A friend of mine had told me about a blog called PEN STROKES and the way she described it I just had to look at it. So,I finally got the blogger (Ernest Wamboye) to write an article for my men readers since I had a guy ask me if my blog is for ladies only after I had posted an article for the ladies. So here is the post by this great man of God I still cannot believe he is just 24 and has been married for a year now to a beautiful woman of God. I believe he has been given  wisdom beyond his age....

When I faced severe sexual temptation and struggles in campus, it was hard to talk about it. There was the fear of being judged- and there was the fear of embarrassment. Guys, you feel me on this, right? Many guys, therefore, prefer to lock themselves up and hope that the problem will go away. However, it doesn’t. The first step to getting out of the rut is confession. We need to talk about it. I pray that you will be brave enough to admit your fears and weaknesses before other men. As believers, there is a lot that God states about our sexuality. He’s shouting from the rooftops. The question is: are we listening? Hopefully these points will help you put some things into practice as you look for mature godly men to walk out of addictions like pornography and masturbation. It eats on the inside and it must be amputated.

1. Usain Bolt should be your role model

Dude, run! When you feel your blood rushing in all the wrong places and the temptress is upon you, flee. I have been locked in a room before with a good-looking prostitute who wanted to have some fun. She had sneaked into our room and convinced my pal to go out and find her missing shoes. I was left in the room with her and the door was locked. She openly seduced me and I was losing my grip. I kept resisting until my pal came back. Had he come a minute later, I wouldn’t be sharing this story. However, I remembered God’s clear call to run, like Joseph.

Genesis 39:12-13 She caught him by his cloak and said, "Come to bed with me!" But he left his cloak in her hand and ran out of the house. When she saw that he had left his cloak in her hand and had run out of the house

Even if she sings in the choir and goes to church four times a week, RUN! Wisdom abounds but few men grasp it.

2. The best defence is a no-fence

Are you still negotiating with death? You want to know how close to the edge of the cliff can you stand without falling. That’s why you ask how far is too far. You are seated on the fence. Where there is smoke there is fire. Make your stand absolute; God’s is. Kissing is foreplay guys. It isn’t activity to pass time. Take time and read books concerning your sexuality. You will realize that your body responds very differently from what the movies tell you. Even the scientists have facts on this one, but God beat them to it.

Ephesians 5:3 But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality.

3. “Appreciating beauty” is the path to pornography and masturbation

Many Christian men use this terrible excuse a lot. A girl in a short skirt walks by and all the heads turn. The glances linger and the excuse is that God’s work of beauty must be appreciated. If you give excuses with lust, you will find yourself in a slow fade to pornography and masturbation. It starts with the girl on the street and continues to the girl on the screen.

Job 31:1 "I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl.

4. The Standards are high!

95% of men face sexual temptation frequently; the remaining 5% are lying. The standards by God are high, guys. Listen to what Jesus said.

 Matthew 5:27-28 "You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.' But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

None of us is righteous when it comes to sexual sin. We need to adopt humility in full view that our sins have separated us from God.

5. There is hope.

Christ Jesus took the punishment for our sins. Does that mean we have a leeway to sin? Absolutely not! The gravity of his sacrifice for you should be pondered on frequently. It will humble you out of your self-righteousness and it will affirm you out of your weakness. Christ died so that we should live. His Grace is not only for pardon but also for empowerment not to fall. I married my wife a year ago. We were both virgins and we waited for the marriage bed. It is possible even in the 21^st century because as long as you have committed to Christ, the victory is won; you just need to live it out. Find the things that destroy your hope. Find the TV series, the magazines, the company and all the stuff that causes you to struggle. Destroy them and embrace life! The last TV series I watched was in 2010. Why? They caused me to stumble. Embrace the hope and set the pace for the women you date, are engaged to and even are married to. Marriage doesn’t mean the struggle of lust will go away guys. Protect your woman’s virtue-even from yourself. Don’t kill the hope availed to you on that cross. Purity will never be a fashion so don’t wait for the masses. Live humbly, live righteously. We have all we need for Godliness.

2 Peter 1:3 His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness

Grace and Love,

Ernest

Faith

We have all heard or read of the great men and women in the bible, like how David with just a sling killed a giant, how Moses led the Israelites and believed God to part the Red Sea, how Abraham at 100 years old believed that God would give him and his aged wife a son, how Daniel refused to bow down to any other God and ended up in a lion's den, how Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego were thrown into the furnace, how Mary accepted to carry Jesus trusting it was God's will even though she was engaged...I can go on and on and on...
Funny how when we hear these stories we forget that these people were ordinary people like you and me, who God used to do amazing things that changed the world forever. These were ordinary people who faced the same challenges we do now maybe even worse, example: Mary was in love with Joseph and had saved herself for him, but when she was told that she was chosen to carry the Messiah she said “I am the Lord’s servant,May your word to me be fulfilled.” She was ready to give it all up just to do God's will and God brought Joseph in the plan. How many of us ladies would give up that fine young brother and trust God to work things out for us so as to fulfill His will? How many of us with a gun pointed on our heads if asked to denounce Christ would? and Daniel was ready to die for Him, How many of us work ourselves up because we do not see the job, the business, the spouse that God has promised? when Abraham believed God when it seemed impossible or when David believed that God would give him victory with only a sling and a stone(1Sam 17:1-58). How many of us believe that we are too messed up or too weak for God to use us to do great things? when Moses a stammerer was used by God and performed great miracles. 
  
Luke 1:35-38: The angel answered, “The Holy Spirit will come on you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the holy one to be born will be called the Son of God. Even Elizabeth your relative is going to have a child in her old age, and she who was said to be unable to conceive is in her sixth month. For no word from God will ever fail.”“I am the Lord’s servant,” Mary answered. “May your word to me be fulfilled.” Then the angel left her.

Daniel 3:24-25: Then King Nebuchadnezzar was astonished and rose up in haste. He declared to his counselors, “Did we not cast three men bound into the fire?” They answered and said to the king, “True, O king.” He answered and said, “But I see four men unbound, walking in the midst of the fire, and they are not hurt; and the appearance of the fourth is like a son of the gods.”

The same God who parted the Red Sea, who made David defeat Goliath, who saved Daniel from the lions. who saved  Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego from the fire, who gave Abraham a son at 100 years old and who used a small normal girl to carry the Messiah is the SAME God who is alive today. So stop worrying that you do not have a job, you are broke, you are single or whatever else, if God can do all these great things what can He not do? Nothing is impossible with God!

So, all these people and many others who we read or hear about from the bible were not supermen or superwomen, they were people just like you and me who trusted God enough, who believed in Him to use  them to accomplish the great things they did. It only takes faith as little as a mustard seed for you to say to a mountain to move and it will move. None of these people was perfect but God used them, whats your excuse? You'll be amazed at how much you can accomplish if only you trust God instead of trusting yourself or your friends

All we need is FAITH, trust God with all your heart and leave Him to take care of you, leave Him to lead you in everything you do and you will be amazed at what He can do. You just might be who people read about in 50 years to come just because you had FAITH.

Self love

Confession time:I am very forgetful and I can take a joke too far and at times I miss out on the reminder that a situation is serious and does not need any jokes. These qualities have got me into trouble with both family and friends and maybe the reasons why my childhood dream of becoming a doctor never came true because probably I would have forgot and left a pair of scissors in a patient's stomach or I would make a joke when breaking the news to family and friends who have just lost their loved ones. Oh well....

Okay that aside, I know each one of us has that one thing either physically or a quality you have that you would want to change. Maybe its because people have told you that you are too tall, too big, too skinny, too dark, too short or whatever else they have told you or you have compared yourself to the pictures in the magazines or you compare yourself to someone who seems to have "it all  together".

BUT.... I have to say that when God made you, He made you exactly the way you are so as to fulfill your purpose on earth, He made you to be that height, He made your nose to look that way, He made your eyes to be that big or that small and He gave you that personality. He did not make a mistake . So the opinion of others should not matter because they did not create you, so who are they to tell you what you have is too much or too little, they have nothing to do with the plans that God has for you.

God made you exactly the way you are for a reason and the perks that we have for a reason because in our weaknesses He is made strong. Have you not seen people with no limbs touch the world? (nick vujicic) Have you not seen the blind, the deaf do amazing things? The people the society might have rendered useless do amazing things because God qualifies the unqualified. Because He does not see people the way we do, He does not look at the physical but at the heart.

1 Samuel 16:7: But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.

Jeremiah 1:5: “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”

Peter 3:3-4 :Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. 

Psalm 139:13-16 : For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.
 
God took His time creating you and as He says in His word that He set you apart even when you were in your mother's womb. He qualified you,so you are the perfect height,the perfect size, the perfect skin color, you have the perfect personality, your nose is in the right position to accomplish what God wants you to.

So  the next time you are tempted to compare yourself with someone who seems to have it all together or to compare yourself with the pictures in the magazine or to believe what someone else tells you,  remember that you have God's approval, you have His stamp on you that says you are beautifully and wonderfully made. For the weaknesses we have, we have them because it is through that that God's strength will be seen when we defeat the odds and achieve what others thought we could not achieve such that everyone will know that it was truly the hand of God in our lives.
So accept yourself, love yourself because the maker of the universe says you are beautiful, talented, smart, strong and you are the apple of His eye, let NO ONE tell you different.

Believing

I recently downloaded some work out routines which I use every morning, each work out is 45seconds but woooaah! they are the longest 45 seconds of my life! More than once I have felt the urge of giving up before the seconds are up but I keep telling myself that whatever am working for will not come easily so under my patting I whisper and ask God to give me strength then before I know it I am done with it.

Adding on to the activities I have taken up recently, I started a small home garden. I have planted lettuce, spinach, flowers, cucumbers and most recently, Sukuma Wiki (Kales). Now the kales were more work than I expected, after planting them a few day later the leaves started turning yellow and dropping despite me religiously watering them morning and evening. I was almost giving up on them, until recently when mum pointed out saying "your sukumas are growing" Wow! they have now new fresh leaves,  couldn't believe it! I had thought of plucking them out.

Ever been in a situation where you have been praying for a breakthrough but it seems like the answer is coming on a tortoise? You do not think you have the strength to keep holding on or to keep believing? You have been praying for a loved one to get healed or for your healing? You have been praying for a job? You have been praying for a spouse? You have been praying for your marriage? You have been praying for a financial breakthrough? Whatever it may be,you feel like you are on the verge of just letting it go and call it quits because if anything the situation seems to be getting worse.

John 11:43-44;   Now when He had said these things, He cried with a loud voice, “Lazarus, come forth!” And he who had died came out bound hand and foot with grave clothes, and his face was wrapped with a cloth. Jesus said to them, “Loose him, and let him go.”

Before Jesus ordered for Lazarus to come forth, He had asked the people to roll out the stone from the tomb and Martha, sister to Lazarus said that the stench would be strong as her brother had been dead for four days, but Jesus told her that "Did I not say to you that if you would believe you would see the glory of God?". Which situation are you in now that you think that even if God was to show up now and answer your prayers that it would be too late? The same way Martha thought it was already four days Jesus, he has already decayed and the stench proves it? 
I love this song that says "Even if He is four days late He is still on time"Because it reminds me when I am downcast and thinking Lord I want to give up, I want to let go that  God is always in control, nothing surprises Him, even before a heartache touches my life it has to go through His hands. That even if in the natural it may seem that nothing can be done, I will still believe that Christ will change my situation that my joy will be restored. 
So believe with me today, that it does not matter how the situation looks like right now, but its not over until God says it is over. So push on, fight on, do not cease praying and most important do not stop believing. It is going to get better and funny thing is most of the times when we are on the verge of giving up, that was when the breakthrough was coming.
The same thing Jesus told Martha that if she would believe she would see the glory of God, is the same thing God is telling you today. 

Have any plans?

My bucket list
1. Learn how to swim
2. Go bungee jumping
3. Go sky diving
4. Learn Spanish (mama mia!)
5. Learn to play a guitar
6. Play with dolphins
7. Catch a sea turtle and then watch it walk into the ocean.
8. Climb Mt. Kenya

Its longer than this but these are the main things in my list. So ever wanted to do something and you keep on pushing it forward always having an excuse, maybe the money is not enough, or the time is not enough?. I remember for me I was waiting for the sunny weather in Nairobi to show up to start my swimming lessons, but now since I changed my hairstyle from braids, my excuse went from the cold weather to I don't want my hair to get wet. 
Sometimes I think we miss the chance to do the things we have always wanted to do because simply we do not do it! We do not take that first step which will always make the second and third step easier. So why not, do it! Want to start a business? Do it! Want to lose some weight? Do it! Want to start saving more? Do it! Just anything that you have been meaning to do, get up and do it!

Ecclesiastes 11:4: Whoever watches the wind will not plant  whoever looks at the clouds will not reap.

Mathew 25: 14-30: “For it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted to them his property. To one he gave five talents, to another two, to another one, to each according to his ability. Then he went away. He who had received the five talents went at once and traded with them, and he made five talents more. So also he who had the two talents made two talents more. But he who had received the one talent went and dug in the ground and hid his master's money. ...

2Kings 7:4: If we say, ‘Let us enter the city,’ the famine is in the city, and we shall die there. And if we sit here, we die also. So now come, let us go over to the camp of the Syrians. If they spare our lives we shall live, and if they kill us we shall but die.”

The one who sits down and wishes will never get what they wish for unless they decide to do it. You will never see that dream come true unless you get up and take the first step, So stop the wishful thinking and get up and do it!

Other than that I believe our plans will fail if we do not involve God, because He is the creator of the universe. How awesome would it be to be receiving counsel from the one who made the business markets, from the one who created the weather, from the one who plans out everything. It would be amazing! you would get ideas that no one has ever thought of, your business will prosper even in the hardest economic times, your plans will always work out well.

Proverbs 16:3: Ask the Lord to bless your plans, and you will be successful in carrying them out. 

Jeremiah 29:11-14: For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you, declares the Lord, and I will restore your fortunes and gather you from all the nations and all the places where I have driven you, declares the Lord, and I will bring you back to the place from which I sent you into exile. 

 

God wants us to step out in faith and take risks to do what we have always wanted to do (of course am not talking of anything that will displease God) , He wants us to be proactive and to stop wishful thinking and just get up and do it!. At the same time we have to place our plans in His hands because that is the ONE true secret to success. So whats in your bucket list? whats your dream? what are the things that you want to achieve in 5, 10 or 15 years? Why don't you start working for them now? Take that first leap of faith and place them in God's hands, He shall never fail you.

 

For the ladies

This is the second time I am writing to the ladies, the first time was about us pulling each other up here and now today I just wanted to be honest with you and just talk about sexual purity and relationships. I know many will not agree with this but we should understand that God's standards will never change for us and there will come a time where EVERY knee will bow to Him.

So you have this "nice guy" he does everything right, he is faithful, he is "God-fearing" because yes he goes to church or you drag him to church hoping to change him, he treats you right and you guys have been together for sometime now and to top it off you two have sex with only each other and maybe "shacking up" (living with each other without any sort of commitment like marriage) or you occasionally spend your weekends at his crib.
You have this guy who you are madly in love with but he gives you mixed signals you do not know where you stand with him, you are the one who initiates meetings or you continuously call or text him but he will never be the first to.
You have this guy who treats you like trash he abuses you physically and verbally, he sleeps with everything in a skirt but you stick with him maybe because you say you are "in love" with him or he has fathered your child.


This are just some of the kind of relationships I know most ladies are in. So where is the truth I want to share?
A man is supposed to lead meaning he should lead you even spiritually. You are not supposed to be the one dragging him to church news flash honey, he will be doing it just to make you happy but not for his own spiritual nourishment.
A God-fearing man does not mean a guy who goes to church but the minute you two are out of church you end up all alone in his house rubbing on each other. A God-fearing man is a man who pursues Christ wholeheartedly whose lifestyle shouts out Christ, he will not be lifting up his hands in worship in church and the next minute his hands are up your skirt. He will be determined to protect your purity because he understands that is what God commands.
A man who truly loves you will commit because he will not want you to get away so he will not waste time to lock you down before another guy shows up, he will not shack up with you.
Men go for what they want and usually they will stop at nothing to get it, so if he wants you, he will come after you, he will make his intentions clear, you will not have to guess where you stand with him.
A man who loves and deserves you will treat you right, he will treat you like a queen because he knows your worth, he will never lay a hand on you or go around cheating on you with anything that wears a skirt.

Proverbs 3:15: She is more precious than jewels, and nothing you desire can compare with her.

Proverbs 31:30: Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

So its time women realize who they are in Christ, to know they are precious jewels and they do not have to settle for less. So I urge you ladies if you are shacking up its time for you to pack it up and leave, if you are in an abusive relationship pack it up and leave, if that "God-fearing" man is not leading you to Christ then pack it up and leave, If you are busy chasing a man who is not totally sold out on you, pack it up and leave! after all the bible says HE who finds a wife NOT SHE that finds a husband.
Yes I know its hard and I understand, you maybe thinking its too late we have been together  for years now and your family has met him or you maybe thinking where will another good looking guy come by you'd rather stick with the one you have or you and him are planning to get married and you are in love and you sleep only with each other so there is nothing wrong with that.

Psalms 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.

 

 

 

 

Dear sisters, You are created by the author of love, when He created you He already knew the man He would match you up with. He knows the desires of your heart, why don't you give Him a chance and let Him write your love story, let Him present that man who submits to Christ, that man who will love you like Christ loved the Church, that man who will lead you to Christ. Let go and let Him, it will not be easy, I know from experience but following Christ will cost you.

 

 Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

 

You may think that you do not need that after all things are going well, this is because of God's grace where He gives us a few breaks here and there but that will never amount to the life he has for you.

So let us avoid the soul ties that come with us having sex outside marriage that forces you to stay with a man that abuses you, lets avoid unnecessary heartaches because we decided to do it our way, lets avoid giving up what is meant for your future husband only. God gives second chances all you have to do is repent and turn around and start walking with Him.  So seek HIM first and He will bring you that man in due time.

Isaiah 34:16^: Seek out of the book of the Lord and read: not one of these [details of prophecy] shall fail, none shall want and lack her mate [in fulfillment]. For the mouth [of the Lord] has commanded, and His Spirit has gathered them.

 
Not one will lack her mate, God Himself said it so stop worrying when the man will come or do not give into the pressure of society talking about your biological clock and just settle. God will reveal Him in due time, till then ladies, live in purity, serve Christ in your singleness and everything else, EVERYTHING ELSE will be given to you.


For the guys I will bring in a guy to write it from a guy's point of view...soon.