BIRTHDAY BLUES

You know how when you are younger you would imagine that by the time you are in your twenties you would have a lot going for you and maybe you will have it all together?
Well..I did I would dream of how I would have my own house, car and I would have bought my mama(I call her mama wanje) a house...

Funny how now.... one of the things I want to achieve before my birthday is to get abs (Don't give me that look,,,I find them hot)..so am working on that as even as I type this my body is sore and am avoiding any jokes today so as to avoid laughing and stretching the upcoming abs..
I asked my mum the other day what she was doing at the age I am almost turning (don't worry I will reveal it in the end) and she told me she was  married and expecting my big brother...alas!! Considering I am writing letters to my unknown future husband ( HERE)  shows that I have no prospects at the moment and hence no upcoming mini me...
I still do not know how to swim...but I can bath myself so I believe I have come a long way..
I no longer cry and call mama wanje when someone steps on my toes...okay maybe I still do but now its me telling mama how my day was and it does not involve her scolding the person who hurt me but then again what am I saying! She still does that...(so Ignore this paragraph)
I still laugh at people who fall down dramatically...in my defense..I giggle...kinda...
I still love the outdoors but at least now I do not go back home with dirty clothes and looking guilty...wait..I do when I hike and get home late after forgetting to buy something I was sent...(ignore this paragraph too)
I still pick on my brother and then get mad at him when he gets back at me...I used to pick on him and he would hit me and I would cry all day till mama wanje gets back home then he would get thrashed!...Waah! at this rate am doubting if I have really grown up..hahaha! (OUCH!)
I do not own a car yet, I still live with mama wanje and as far as buying her a house...its still a future plan...
Come to think of it..I do not think I have changed that much (I don't know if that is a good thing or not)

But for the 23 years I have lived one thing is evident...

God's grace in my life...He has remained faithful when I rebelled against Him....He has shown me favor over and over again...He has opened doors for me that I had never thought of....He has blessed my family abundantly....He has given me amazing friends....He has restored my health over and over again...Most importantly... He saved me and He called me His own...He chose me and set me aside...He called me by my name and rescued me from death and substituted me with His son Jesus Christ on the cross so that I wouldn't know how much it cost....and yet again He loves me UNCONDITIONALLY!  even when I fail time and time again.
In short I have seen God as My healer, My friend, My comfort, My defender, My strength, My Father and My savior for the 23 years I have lived and I thank Him that I am about to see another great year and its a great comfort to know the Maker of the universe has my world in His hands...so even though I have not yet accomplished my goals I can find rest in the fact that He said:

Deut 31:8:

It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; He will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.”

Jeremiah 29:11:For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

P.S I am turning 24 on 5th March

DEAR FUTURE HUSBAND

I thought I was good at letter writing until, I sat down and tried to write this to you. Maybe I have met you, Maybe we pass by each other everyday, Maybe you don't even know that I exist, Maybe you will read this, Maybe I will be the one to show you a letter a wrote to you before I met you.

You might be in Timbuktu  volunteering in a medical camp or spreading the gospel...I hope both. You may be in the city running to close a deal, or you may be down on your knees praying, you may be in the gym (smh) or nibbling on some chicken wings.

Whatever you are doing or where you are I would like to say this to you:

I haven't figured out every detail of our wedding (contrary to what people say about girls) BUT I have one thing figured out....fried chicken will be part of the menu....it just has to be!

I am very forgetful (I know you will figure this out earlier when I will forget to pick up something you wanted...so I apologize in advance) BUT you do not have to worry about me forgetting my vows...

I can get a bit crazy sometimes and just decide to break dance in the streets...so maybe you will be marrying a Psycho...I am kidding...maybe...perhaps...

My idea of a romantic getaway is being in the wild, where  its just you, me and nature and we can recreate the garden of Eden, without the snake and the leaves Adam and Eve used to cover themselves up with (If you know what I mean).

I hope you have a big appetite because I am currently taking home culinary classes from your future mother-in-law, and I am working on creating the "ENID sandwich" which am hoping will be a hit and I will come up with a better name for it...hey! maybe you will help me come up with the name , so now you already have an idea of what kind of snack will be packed for you.

So a lot of guys have already misspelled my name: I have been called Edin, Enith, Elid, Emid...waaah! If I had a dollar for every one of them you'd be marrying Oprah. So am hoping you get it right the first time I tell you or you already did... and they have used all kind of pick up lines the best one being " Hey Enid, what do you need?...me?"..So hope you will make me laugh the first time you say hi, say something cheesy or simply say Hi....but be creative, try get a smile from me.

I cannot take a picture doing the duck face...I do not know how this piece of information may be of importance to you, but just thought of putting it out there.

I still love cartoons, so I hope you are a bit goofy..and we can act like kids when around each other and just laugh...

I cry when watching romantic comedies, no matter how many times I watch them...but I will always pretend am yawning then rub my eyes...so feel free to let me lie on your chest when watching them and let me "yawn"

I LOVE my family...they mean the world to me...and am sure you will fit right in!!.

Most importantly...

I believe God is preparing me for you, as He is leading and guiding me to resemble Him...because in Him I have come to know what true love means...and am learning to resemble the Proverbs 31 woman. Who will make you and our kids look forward to coming home everyday because I will make our house a home. I will defend our kids with my life..and praying that God shows me how to submit to you as you submit to Him and be your helper.

I will always cover our home with prayers, I will always strive to be your biggest fan and correct you in a gentle way, I will let you lead our home because I know that you will be leading us with the wisdom from above, I will be open to try new things with you, I will keep my body in check so that we will be able to do the morning jog together when we are 60(among other things *wink). We will fight, make up, laugh, cry, get weary but may we always put God at the center of our marriage. You will not have to worry about me cheating because for you I have waited.....

Love,

Future wifey.

Being a Blessing

Like a ritual, I put on my earphones when I get into the bus and I get lost in the music, sometimes I would dream about my future and sometimes I would take time and see what is happening outside. So this particular day, a young lady came and sat next to me with a cute baby girl and sat the baby in between us. Sure I didn't mind getting squeezed by her and I felt a sense of "pride" that I had grown in character from the days when such things would be part of my conversation on how people are inconsiderate in public vehicles. As we went along I felt this urge to pay the woman's bus fare and I remembered that morning asking God to use me to bless someone. So I knew this was my chance but I ended up reasoning myself out of it..thinking " no Lord this can't be you, she will probably think I am weird or embarrass me in front of every one" . I believe that day I missed an opportunity to be blessed. 

Take a moment and think about some opportunities you have had to be a blessing to somebody and you didn't simply because you came up with an excuse...like naaah! I don't have enough money,or I don't have the time, I don't know them, why do I have to do it..and the list goes on and on.

I believe that every time we pass an opportunity to be a blessing to someone we miss out on God's blessings on our lives. Because He has instructed us in His word to love others and if we live in obedience to His word we end up blessed. So how are we living in love when we are so caught up in ourselves that we fail to see those around us who may need a helping hand? How are we living in love if at the end of everyday we are always so concerned about what we would get out of people more than what we would give?

Mathew 5:16:In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.

Philippians2:3-4: Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.  

Luke 6:31 :And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.  

I want us to challenge ourselves today to ask God every morning to show us someone we will bless for that day...make up a list of the people you will be around that day and purpose to be a blessing to them either a word of encouragement, being a listening ear, offering to buy them lunch or a snack. On top of all that make sure you don't reason yourself out of it.
  I believe that the reason why most of us are miserable or frustrated is because we have ourselves on our minds all day, every day. Take up this challenge today where every morning you think on purpose on how you will be a blessing to someone and see how much your joy will increase just because you took time to take care of someone else's needs.


There are other times when I chose to take a chance and bless someone despite the fear of being rejected and in some way or another I would see God open up some doors that I thought would never be open, not only that but even the smile from those people would turn my worst days to my best days....

New Year

Its that time of the year when I would get new books for school and somehow my brother would convince me to give him my new exercise  book claiming he would give it back. Oh! And the new shoes and sweater which would have a hole by the time I get back home. I remember my mum asking if I chew my sweater , come to think of it I think I did.
A new year always comes with something new not just tangible things, but also its always a chance for people to start over. The excitement of new books was because you would start writing on a new clean page and you would do your best to start with a perfect handwriting which later on you would give up and go back to staining the pages with ink.
The same thing with a new year, you have been given a chance to do it over again, 365 days for you to not repeat the same mistakes, set new goals, meet the goals you already made and to just simply start over.
What do you wish to achieve this year? What is that one thing that you are trusting God for? What's that thing you wish you did last year?

Jeremiah 29:11:For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. 

 

My prayer for you this year is for you to make the decision to let Christ live in you. Because as much as  this is a new year we are still the same people and we will keep doing the same things we did last year and news flash! you will end up in the same place you did last year. Because in Christ we become new creations, the old is gone. He tells you to forget your past failures and let Him lead you and see the great things He has in store for you. He tells you to let go of your past hurts and let Him give you joy with each day. He tells you forget about what you did wrong that He has forgiven your sins and will  remember them no more. He tells you to come to Him and let Him unburden you of all your worries, anxiety and pain.
I pray that this year if you have not let Christ in your heart let Him in and if you already did, purpose to grow in Him.
Because its only in Christ that you will find new life. Let this be the year that you walk in your destiny because you stopped leading yourself and allowed to be Christ led.

CHRISTmas..

This is the season to be jolly...... Jingle bells jingle bells...... Silent night. I have to admit that I only sing and listen to these carols during the Christmas season and they usually sound great at this time of the year. So this will be my 23rd Christmas and I have seen the meaning of Christmas change for me over the years. When I was a kid it was that time of the year where we would accompany dad to go cut down a tree (we did not cause global warming) and then decorate it, get new clothes and go compare with what my mates got, have balloons hanging around the house and last but not least watch the movie "home alone". mmmmh the good old days. Then during my teenage age I thought it was lame getting new clothes for Christmas and hanging balloons in the house and Christmas lights so for me it meant it was that time of the year we would go out as a family and have access to an "all you can eat" buffet.
So what does it mean to me now?

It still means its a time I get to spend with family but what I missed to see was the reason why we had to celebrate Christmas. First I have a problem with the word X-mas because it removes Christ out of the picture (so when you are sending me Christmas messages change the X to Christ, I do not do algebra anymore). Picture this, Christ in all His majesty and splendor left His throne so that He would sleep in manger that night. Its like you been told to leave all the luxuries you have and  go live in a garbage dump so that you can give your home to someone else. How many of us would agree?  I know I wouldn't!

Isaiah7:14;Therefore the Lord himself will give you a sign: The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and will call him Immanuel.

Luke 1:35:The angel answered, "The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the holy one to be born will be called the Son of God

 John 3:16:“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.

This was the beginning of God revealing His grace to us, Christ came so that we would be able to start over, so that no matter how much we would mess up we would still be able to come back to God and tell Him "We are sorry and ask for forgiveness" It meant that we would share in His glory, but this did not mean that we were now given a go-ahead to sin. No! it still remained that the wages of sin is death, what this meant was: Once we would ask for forgiveness and repent it meant us changing what we pursue, meaning we would stop pursuing sin and pursue Christ. It does not mean we will not fall but the difference now will be our hearts pursue what is true, right, noble and pure. Your life as a Christian is not based on you reciting a sinners prayer but for you to grab hold of the life that Christ has for you.

 1 Peter 3:18: For Christ died for sins once and for all, a good man on behalf of sinners, in order to lead you to God. He was put to death physically, but made alive spiritually.

Romans 4:25:He was delivered over to death for our sins and was raised to life for our justification.
Romans 5:6:You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly.

 Romans 13:13:Let us walk properly as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and sensuality, not in quarreling and jealousy.


If we would only understand how great that sacrifice was for God to give His ONLY son to die on the cross for us, for Christ to step down and live as a human being so that He would understand us then we would celebrate Christmas with Christ at the center of it. We would not waste money, food and we would not take these celebrations as an opportunity for us to get drunk and have wild parties,go crazy and have one night stands. (Yes we do get carried away!)
But we would take this time to open up our houses to strangers, to share with the less fortunate, visit the sick, the people in jail, mend broken relationships,spread the gospel, spend time with family and to thank God for giving us His son to die on the cross for us because He took our place on that cross. Now you will never know how much it cost for you to pay for your sins because He simply came and slept in a manger on Christmas day.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

End of the year

 

The year is coming to an end we are all excited! We cannot wait for the parties and the gifts...it has been a good year for me and I want to count my blessings.
1.I re-dedicated my life to Christ.
2. I got to visit Mombasa for the first time.
3. I made new friends from California.
4. I am graduating in a few days(yaaaay!)
5. I got a job.
6. We moved houses with my family.
7. I started this blog and so far it has 3176 page reviews in 6 months.

 The list goes on and on.. I have had my fair share of bad days and had to make some tough decisions which meant tougher consequences. I chose to reflect at the end of this year and tell God I am grateful for all that He has done for me, even when I did not understand why I had to do some things and go through certain situations, I thank Him because He reminds me that He has it all in control and that is just part of His grand plan.

I do not know how the year is ending for you, maybe on a low, you thought you would have achieved certain things; maybe you thought you would be married, you thought you would be having a job by now, your loved one would still be around or your business would have picked up. Whatever it is, do not be discouraged because whatever situation you are in now is only a fraction of the bigger picture which is the great and mighty plans God has in store for you. Do not see it as the end instead see it as the beginning of the rest of your life.

As you make resolutions this time, pray about them and place them in God's hands and may the plans align with His word. So what are you thankful for? Even if the bad days have been more than the good days why don't you just take time and write down what you are thankful for and read them to God. Starting with the fact that you have been able to see this far into the year.

From me:

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY 2014!!!

CAT POOP LESSONS (DISSAPOINTMENT)

Ever since I started my small home garden there has been these gang of cats coming in and just "let it all out" in the soil, so a couple of times I would build a fortress by the window and wait to whack one....and to add on top I do not like cats so now I was justified. Every time I would whack one I was so proud of myself and think "now they know this is a no-go zone" but they would bust my bubble the following day when I would have to get a plastic bag and collect the "fortune" they left me. I might add I prayed and asked God to keep them away but they kept coming each time with a bigger "prize" to collect. We would even exchange ideas with my mum on ways of getting rid of them until finally I a got a revelation that we are getting free manure and we might as well enjoy it. Long story short, the garden has blossomed!
Sorry animal rights activists and cat lovers....:-(

Okay enough of the cat chronicles...I am sure we have all wanted something so much and at times we do not get it...it could be a job, a person, whatever it is. We have all been dissapointed, let down, left by people we loved, had our dreams shattered when we thought we had got a breakthrough and the feeling is horrible! You will give up or simply just let go. What if I tell you that those disspointments might be the best things that have ever happened to you? Unbelievable? Indulge me for a minute and hear me out...

The bible tells us that even before you were born God set you apart and He already had your life planned out from the beginning to the end meaning He already knew the doors He would open and the doors He would close to get you to your destiny. Not convincing? Okay...
He says He will never leave us nor forsake us,  meaning that even when it seems that all hope is gone or when you feel like failure  He is there, the presence of that pain is not evidence for God's absence, He is there..ALWAYS.
He says He has great and might plans for you that you know NOTHING about! Meaning your mind cannot even comprehend the things He has in store for you, even that job that may have seemed like the best thing in the world cannot compare with the one He has in store for you, even that person that rejected you or walked away that you might have thought is the best thing since OLX cannot compare to the person God has placed for you.
He loves us so much that He gave up His only son for us, ONLY son for us! His love is unconditional! Its the one thing in your life that cannot be taken away! Meaning you are the apple of His eye that He can give you anything in this world that you desire but if He does not, He is simply saying "I have something better for you"

Jeremiah 1:5: “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”

 Deuteronomy31:6:Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.” 

Jeremiah 29:11:For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.  

Jeremiah 33:3:‘Call to Me, and I will answer you, and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know.’

Romans 8:35-39:Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? As it is written, “For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

So just like that cat poop it does not look good on my garden but it has flourished it and I was busy trying to get rid of it. That situation that you are in that is so painful at the moment, that you just want the pain to go away is meant to build something in you and prepare you for what God has in store for you, it will make you flourish!
Remember that nothing surprises God, He has a plan for you. So, whatever you wanted so much but did not get, trust me when I say it was not part of your destiny it might have  hindered it. If you were to have it you would have gotten  it.
So, to challenge myself and you learn to trust in God through every season of your life, in times of lack and plenty learn to be content and trust Him. He knows what He is doing!