Why I said YES to the ring....

Recently I got the opportunity to moderate an open forum for a ladies' retreat we had and I took the chance to ask the older ladies to share their 'aha!" moments about when they were dating their husbands........in other words to share that moment they knew that this is the guy they will marry and why.....in the course of this a few people ganged up and thought I should share why I said yes...I declined and moved the session on with the excuse of time......
I express myself better in writing than talking so I chose to share it here.....so why did I say yes?


1. His love for God

I know this has been shared in a lot of forums of the kind of man a lady should marry until it has become a cliche of some sort....
Thing is ....his lifestyle shows it more than the number of times he says it...I have seen Him pass on opportunities because he wanted to do what God has called him to do...I have seen him lend a helping hand to a lot of people even when I thought he was doing too much....I have seen him cut off things from his life that cause him to stumble.....
I have heard from third parties who have known him from his pre-teen, teenage and even before we met of how he has always been unashamed of his love for God......
His life has witnessed to me and has even challenged me to improve my walk with God....

Ladies, you have to check the fruits of the man...its not enough for him to tell you he is born again yet his life does not show it.....

2. He protects my purity

Well, am no angel .....thing is when he asked me to be his girlfriend we sat down and placed a few boundaries to enable us to wait until we get married to have sex.....(I talked of the reasons here)
I have seen him a million times restraining himself from breaking the boundaries ..even avoiding conversations that would lead to us breaking them...
He purposefully guards it with all he has......he actually takes the lead in ensuring that we walk in purity...and that is one of the most admirable things about him....and I respect him a lot for being a man of honor...

3. His purpose

I will not share exactly what it is...but from the onset..it was something that God had also placed in my heart and until recently is when we found out we can actually do it together....
I can  see myself helping him to fulfill His God given purpose as it is something that goes so well with the vision I have always had of the kind of work I would do with my husband....
It still amazes me how God has done this......

4. He supports me

He has constantly shown me support in achieving my dreams even if it meant having us be apart for sometime....
He celebrates even the smallest progress I make in my career....he is the kind who goes all out to celebrate my success....

5. He is my best friend

He is truly a friend to me...I can tell him anything and everything without feeling judged.....
I am my craziest when with him.....and yet it does not make him uncomfortable....
He calls me out when I am being a brat and corrects me with love....


Just a bonus one, he values physical fitness I had always prayed for someone who will value this as much as I do...and I mean since I have met him...I have been able to achieve a lot more on my fitness...lets say he has brought bike riding into my life and my legs do not like it at times but I love the results.....and of course because a man who values physical fitness has a great physique...*wink


The thing is, I have been in other relationships before I met Grey and none of them had the vision of marriage ahead of them.....and before I met him...I had taken a break on the dating scene so that God would work on  me...to break me and to mould me to be a different  woman and to desire a relationship that would please Him...and in His own timing he saw it fit for us to meet....and even in this journey...we have wanted to quit several times and its not always a pretty picture.and God is constantly molding us to be the best match for each other...  .but I can say that God has kept us this far and ALL glory goes to Him....

I write this with the hope that it will encourage you to wait for God's best for you.....and have a relationship that pushes you closer to God

Dear Women

Dear women,

We live in a world that portrays women who dress less are the most attractive,....
We live in a world that  tells us to 'think like men and act like ladies' and 'what a man can do a woman can do'...
We live in a world where we are told that we should start pursuing men.....
We live in  a world where we are constantly being reminded that having the latest fashion trend will make people like you more...
We live in a world where we are told that  calling ourselves a 'female dog' is appropriate because it means we are strong.....
We live in a world where we are told we need to sleep with a man to keep him.....
We live in a world where we are told we need to do all it takes to get ahead......
We live in a world where we are constantly pushed to fight each other.....
We live in a world that is constantly reminding us that our shape and skin color is not good enough...



Dear Women,

This is a letter to remind us that  we have been called to be women of a different status......the kind of status that does not allow us to sell ourselves short by giving our bodies to 'random' men....but understanding that ours bodies are so precious ....because we were uniquely formed that only someone who has paid the price for you will be able to explore the beautiful body that God has given you..the way it should be explored.....
The kind of status that calls for us to uphold modesty and understand that our dressing speaks volumes about us...to understand that we are already beautiful and we do not have to prove it to anyone else by showing off more skin....
The kind of status that calls for us to understand we were created to THINK, TALK, ACT and DO things as WOMEN and NOT men....that God created us to thrive in our femininity..not to try to be like men but to be WOMEN....
The kind of status that calls for us to be so secure in our abilities, looks, gifts, etc that we do not feel the need to outdo each other.......
The kind of status that calls for us to raise our standards to that of Christ..that we will constantly strive to reflect Him in every area of our lives....that when people interact with us they will see Christ...

Women! We have a huge responsibility of showing girls what it means to be a woman.....to make them see that its not the shape of their bodies, the length of their hair, the clothes they wear that defines a woman...but its her gentleness, her kindness, her ability to uphold virtue that defines her.....

We have a responsibility to show girls that purity is something to be protected.....its not something to be used as a bait for a man.....

We have a responsibility to raise the standards set by this world to standards set by the women who pursued Christ.....to have the obedience to God that Mary had, the kind of loyalty Ruth had, the courage that Esther had, the love of Christ that Mary Magdalene had......we are called to be so much more than our HIPS, LIPS AND FINGER TIPS...we are called to be ROYALTY